Popular music today is nothing more than Art's ejaculate dripping down the leg of culture. Seriously people, what are we doing? There was a time when the Rock'n'Roll of Chuck Berry and the Big Bopper had voodoo powers—it could take over any young unsuspecting soul whose ears happened upon it while turning the dial to the AM radio. There was a time when the opening notes of "Chantilly Lace" would trigger a sudden deluge in every pair of panties in the room. For women, Rock & Roll was their gateway to open sexuality. It's as if "Peggy Sue" somehow unlocked the secret powers of the collective American vagina.
It's a different story for men, though. A man's sexuality is a much more honest and prevalent thing. It has no shame, for it dangles triumphantly and is scarcely ever afraid to give its salutation. Our penises neither hide themselves, nor do they mince words. Thus, a man's sexuality needs not the services of Ritchie Valenz to reveal it's true nature. This is why Rock & Roll stands as Mankind's pinnacle achievement: it was that which finally allowed those young lasses to lift up those poodle skirts.
And then came the Beatles. Enough has been said of them, already. They are the Shakespeare of modern music; conceived by some Divine Hand to serve humanity's greater purpose (except for Ringo, that was an accident).
The Beatles started it all: all the sexual liberation and "tune in, turn on, and drop out" mentalities of those ensuing decades; until MTV slithered its way into the mainstream and coerced all of us naked and curious Eves and Adams to devour the forbidden mango of televised music (it was not an apple, as the legend dictates, for we all know that the glorious slurp of the juicy mango feels far more sinful and decadent than the honest and god-fearing crunch of the Granny Smith). There was a death that day. Not "Video Killing The Radio Star" but rather, killing music itself. Music became something visual that day; and worse, from that day on, the youth of America lost their freedom to decide for themselves what was cool.
Fuck that. Music should be something that date rapes all 5 senses—that puts your psyche through gyroscope. There are exceptions, sure. But looking at the spectrum of "popular" music one can only take away the notion that musical art has become lazy. In 10 years every album made in the U.S. will be produced by Timbaland. God help us…
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